But first, let’s remember the animals:

A nationwide referendum is taking place in Switzerland on a proposal to give animals the constitutional right to be represented in court.

Animal rights groups say appointing state-funded animal lawyers would ensure animal welfare laws are upheld, and help prevent cases of cruelty.

Opponents say Switzerland does not need more legislation regarding animal protection. The Swiss government has recommended that voters reject the idea.

There is already one animal lawyer in Switzerland.

And now to David Cameron: there is no conservative party in the UK, but the party masquerading under that name is going after the gay vote:

In the latest development in his campaign to show how dramatically the Tories have changed, David Cameron has published the party’s first-ever official list of openly gay MPs.

The Conservatives say they have 20 openly gay candidates standing in the Election. Of those, 11 told party chiefs they were ‘happy’ to be named in the first authorised list of gay Conservative candidates.

It has led some to suggest jokingly that the Tories might change the party’s traditional blue colour to the rainbow flag of the gay movement.

Mr Herbert [a party spokesman] said: ‘A successful political party ought to look like the country it seeks to govern. If we were truly representative, we would have 99 women, 16 black or ethnic minority and ten gay MPs.’

Mr. Herbert, unwilling to be outdone by Swiss sapience,  went on to clarify that should the Tories win, to ensure fair representation the cabinet would include 5 dogs, 3 cats, a parrot (a stand-in for David Cameron) and a gaggle of geese in the back benches.