When I was in Italy a few years back I remember visiting the basilica where St. Anthony’s tongue, larynx and associated parts could be inspected. A book has been written about scattered holy body parts:

They are scattered all over the world – holy little odds and bits: St. Anthony’s shrivelled tongue in Rome, a tooth from the Buddha in Sri Lanka, the finger of St. John the Baptist in Florence.

More than isolated curiosities, these pieces of the dead have always attracted reverence from the religious who find in the smallest, and often grossest, body parts, evidence of holiness.

Why else would an English bishop take a bite out of St. Mary Magdalene’s bones? And how did a hair from Muhammad’s chin end up in Kashmir?

These are the kinds of questions that inspired author and scholar Peter Manseau to embark on a journey around the world to investigate relics and the people who adore them, which resulted in the book Rag and Bone: A Journey Among the World’s Holy Dead.

I saw quite a few relics while in Italy but they did not, unlike many of the churches that housed them, inspire reverence. In fact, after a while I found myself humming Spike Milligan’s version of, “I left my heart in San Francisco”:

I left my heart in San Francisco,
I left my knees in old Peru.
I left my little wooden leg
Hanging on a metal peg,
And my eyeballs I gave to you.
I left my teeth on Table Mountain,
High on a hill they smile at me.
When I come home to you, San Francisco,
There won’t be much left of me.

Canterbury is not sending out enough “gay signals” apparently:

Historic city ‘not gay enough’ say equality campaigners

Its ancient cathedral is the oldest church in Britain still in use and millions of tourists visit each year.

But Canterbury, it seems, is not all-inclusive in what it offers.

The historic cathedral city is simply not gay enough, according to an official complaint.

The city – scene of the murder Archbishop Thomas Becket in 1170 and famed for its association for Geoffrey Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales – is the subject of an investigation by the local government watchdog after gay activists lodged an official complaint.

They say the city council has failed to ‘send out signals’ that it welcomes the gay community.

Canterbury, the complaint says, ‘is still a cultural wilderness for LGBTs’ (lesbian, gay bisexual or transgender).

Among complaints, made by the group Pride in Canterbury, is that the city does not have a gay bar or community centre.

The organisation has also complained about the ‘stereotypical’ depiction of a gay character in a play staged at the city’s Marlowe theatre.

Last night the council seemed bewildered by the investigation, insisting it had done its best to help the gay community by offering money, help and use of its facilities – including £4,000 in grants to Pride in Canterbury.

But Andrew Bretell, of Pride in Canterbury, said more was needed and that the council was missing out on the ‘pink pound’.

He said he complained to the council last year and when that failed went to the ombudsman.

‘They’re more interested in ticking their equality boxes and engaging in back and forth ‘who said what’ games than they are in dealing with the real issues.

‘We do not believe the council want a thriving LGBT community in our city.’

This should put to rest the canard that the homosexual agenda is to gain equal access or have equal rights and opportunities. It is really about campaigning for equal cultural pervasiveness; an endeavour as ridiculous as insisting there aren’t enough bearded men in Canterbury.

Speaking of bearded men, although Rowan Williams is doing his best at increasing the gaiety of the Anglican church, it looks as if he needs to re-double his efforts; after all Anglicanism’s colonial centre is still in Canterbury.

What Canterbury needs is one of these:

This is one of the most interesting birthday cards I have ever received. Judging by the signatures, it is from all my friends in the Diocese of Niagara (I really did receive this in the mail today):

It’s Darwin’s birthday; the Roman Catholic church has capitulated and agrees that, at heart, we are all monkeys; the Anglican Church has decided it’s OK to convert unbelievers after all; according to the Bishop of London, nudge, nudge, losing your job is good for you; Peter Akinola’s letter to Rowan Williams was written by someone else and is part of a larger, deeper conspiracy according Rev. Colin Coward, purveyor of poofta propaganda; I found a crack on the side of my Martin D35 which prompted me to play Can’t Keep from Crying Sometimes.

Now I am going to have a snooze and when I wake up all of this will have gone away.

Nova Scotia Scott tagged me so that I could bore everyone with a list of jobs I’ve had. I admit, after an early, unfulfilled yearning to be a train driver, my ambition was to live as a tantrel; but things rarely work out as one hopes.

“It’s simple. Just list all the jobs you’ve had in your life, in order. Don’t bust your brain: no durations or details are necessary, and feel free to omit anything that you feel might tend to incriminate you. I’m just curious. And when you’re done, tag another five bloggers you’re curious about.”

Counting traffic for the city.

Ice-cream vendor – on a bike.

Cataloguing school health data for the NHS.

Teaching computer languages at a community college.

From then on – that’s the last 40 years or so – I’ve been paid by various companies to fiddle around with their computers, mostly mainframes and networks. Many of my compatriots are either retired, dead or senile, but the alluring prospect of retiring myself recedes a little more each year.

From the Spectator.

One Star Hotel

From the Telegraph

Methodist minister faked hate campaign against herself , court told

Rev Janet Magee, 62, claimed she was the victim of sinister telephone calls, poison pen letter and had a dead hedgehog and dog excrement posted through her letterbox.

Her complaints to police led to the arrest of Roger Chessell, a Methodist circuit steward, who had openly accused her of “working with or for Satan.”

He was interviewed at length and his house was searched before he was released without charge, Grimsby Crown Court heard.

Rev Magee was arrested after police secretly installed a CCTV camera at her home which proved she could not have received the hedgehog on the date she claimed.

What I can’t help wondering is, how does one put a hedgehog, dead or otherwise through a letterbox? Of course, it must be a relief to the church-going public that the police are ever vigilant against the improper use of hedgehogs.

This makes the current disputes rattling the Anglican church look positively banal.

Update: Monday Sept 29.

Here we are stuck in Biarritz: the bus driver has left his keys in the ignition and somehow locked the outside doors.